The impact of the awareness of the loss of a valuable treasure can be devastating
This was David’s experience.
“So David and his men wept aloud until they had no strength left to weep.”
~1 Samuel 30:4
David and his men had a great pity party going on here.
Did you know that pity party is a major reason most folks never get to regain stuff they’ve lost? Ultimately, when you refuse to end the pity party, you make your losses permanent. If you don’t stop feeling sorry for yourself, and looking for who will feel sorry for you, you may never be able to recover your losses.
When the awareness of the significance of what you’ve lost hits you, the attendant sorrow can paralyze any motivations left within you to move on. But, until you become solution-oriented, rather than looking for sympathy, you will remain in the pit.
Quit playing the blame game and take personal responsibility for your recovery
In David’s case, matters were further worsened by the anger and frustration of his men. They blamed him for their losses and wanted to kill him.
“David’s two wives had been captured- Ahinoam of Jezreel and Abigail, the widow of Nabal of Carmel. David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters…”
~1 Samuel 30:5-6
This is exactly what most people will do: Blame anyone but themselves for their losses, rather than look inward and take responsibility for recovery. Wherever you meet a pity party, you would usually notice that the participants are also playing the blame game. Such attitude is a great enemy of recovery.
Notice how Esau couldn’t see his fault in selling his birthright.
“Esau said, “Isn’t he rightly named Jacob? He has deceived me these two times: He took my birthright, and now he’s taken my blessing!” Then he asked, “Haven’t you reserved any blessing for me?””
Really? Still blaming Jacob, huh? Ridiculously, even at that point, Esau hadn’t realized that the birthright and the blessing were one and the same. Such foolishness. You just can’t eat your cake and have it.
As a matter of fact, only those who can move beyond blaming others (God and satan included) can achieve total recovery; because an important secret to recovery is to identify how you have personally contributed to the loss, then repent and make the necessary restitutions and adjustments.
“A man’s own folly ruins his life, yet his heart rages against the LORD.”
Listen: Though satan must have attacked you, though God may have allowed it, and though other people may have been instrumental to your losses, unless you quit playing the blame game, end your pity party, and take personal responsibility for what happened, you won’t be able to recover your losses.
Encourage yourself and arise
The prodigal son eventually found the strength to go home.
“I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, ”
He got to the point where it no longer mattered that some false friends had ripped him off. The fact that the owner of the pigsty would not let him fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating no longer mattered. What really mattered was what he did to be there; and what he needed to do to get out. He spoke to himself. He encouraged himself. And he brought his pity party and blame games to an end. Then he arose and went home.
What God did is not the issue now. What satan did isn’t either. And neither does it matter what anyone else did. What matters right now is what you did then, and what you need to do now. Figure out your role in the mess, then reverse it. That’s what counts.
David also was able to terminate his pity party. He did not seek any man’s encouragement. He did not wait for his men to come around. He encouraged himself and found strength in his God.
“…But David found strength in the LORD his God.”
~1 Samuel 30:5-6
To recover all, you must do the same: quit blaming others, terminate the pity party, and seek strength in the Lord your God.
King James Version (KJV)
1Hear my cry, O God; attend unto my prayer.
2 From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
3 For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy.